I booked the flight for Clayton’s funeral last night. It’s bothering me because a funeral isn’t supposed to be 4 years after someone passes. The celebration of life we had originally planned was...
Summer solstice. Winter solstice. The longest and shortest days of the year in the northern hemisphere. When I imagine the four seasons, I often will envision the face of a round clock,...
BRAVERY What does it mean to be brave? Definition of bravery 1 : the quality or state of having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty : the quality or state of being...
Edward’s 53rd Birthday Comfortably run. No, not a typo. Simply a not particularly brilliant nod to Pink Floyd’s “Comfortably Numb”. I do indeed mean that I am comfortably run. By a 10 km road...
As an adult, I have always been an avid reader. I started a book club in 2012 that met monthly for a solid 7 years. My friends would tease me that any books they picked I’d already read. This was...
I’ve brought up some of the ins and outs of being a care-griever. I can’t speak to the emotions that come with sudden loss but I can speak about the experience watching someone you love slowly fade...
**This post contains discussion of suicide and seeking mental health treatment for suicidal ideation. Some background: before Boris died by suicide, he was hospitalized three different times. Two...
After this past Winter I have resolved that next year, I am getting out of Dodge. It is not merely the frequent snowstorms, or the relentless cold, or the shearing wind, or the constant overcast skies...
The Puzzle of Time Sitting at my desk, on May 17th (a Tuesday) at 8:48 pm Pacific Standard Time. The day flew by with little to count for it. Tomorrow we are mid-week as another week flies by. Time...
Main image by Duy Pham on Unsplash I am coming to the end of a lovely short week’s holiday in Mallorca, taking part in an open water swimming camp, geared around being able to swim 10km in “event”...
It can feel at times like we're being guided toward an imaginary ticker tape that we'll one day cross through in celebration after "completing" grief.
The truth is, there's really no end goal. No finish line. We integrate the love and memories and we bring them forward with us into every day.
#ssigriefmythbusters
Friday, May 27, 2022
A lot of people assume that all widowed people receive a life insurance payout after the death of their person. In the United States, only 52% of people have life insurance. Of those people, 27% don't carry an amount sufficient to cover all bills in the event of their person's death.
https://www.policygenius.com/life-insurance/life-insurance-statistics/
#ssigriefmythbusters
Friday, May 13, 2022
As humans, we tend to want to linger in the "good" emotions and speed through the discomfort of the "challenging" emotions. This is true in grief as well, but if we deny ourselves the anger (and other hard emotions) we are likely to make repeated trips back to it several times over. There's no timeline to any of this - only your time - and if anger requires a bit of extra time to push through now and in the future, give yourself the grace to walk through it as often and as long as needed.
#ssigriefmythbusters
Friday, April 29, 2022
Ever hear that you should take their photos down? That it's been long enough, and having those memories on the walls must make you feel sad? That they're concerned because you still have memories of them displayed?
When we deny ourselves the opportunity to integrate our past with our present, we miss out on the comfort that bringing them forward into today can provide. You don't have to take those photos down until (or if) you're ready.
#ssigriefmythbusters
Friday, April 22, 2022
This is a big one. We're often not told of the body's physical responses to the heavy toll that grief takes. Grief shows up physically in all sorts of different ways - hair loss, weight loss/weight gain, increased anxiety, mind fog, the inability to focus or read...our bodies all respond differently to the weight of the grief we carry.
#ssigriefmythbusters
(While this is true, we would be remiss if we didn't encourage you to discuss the physicality of your grief with your doctors)
Friday, March 25, 2022
